Are Men Really As Complicated?!

All our lives we've been taught to believe in a certain way. That is, men often hurt the women they love the most.

Now before I go any further with this, let me first apologize for my language I may use in this post. :P

But seriously. That above statement about men hurting the women they love? What a load of BULLSHIT!!!

Now that quote I posted above of E.L. James', for any of you who don't know, is from the famous book "Fifty Shades of Grey" & that quote is still stuck in my head after all these years. Probably the only thing that made sense in that book. ;)

So, for you ladies out there wondering why men are so complicated, the truth is THEY AREN'T!

Now there are some instances they can bullshit their way into tricking us BUT, most of the time, they're literal, straightforward people. The trick is to take everything they say literally. Don't overthink it, don't analyze it, don't justify it & don't search for hidden meanings. Once you absorb what they say, watch what they do. If their actions compliment their words, you have your answers right in front of you.

The thing is, women have hidden agendas whether we like to admit it or not. It's no secret that most women talk opposites. I'd like to emphasize on the "MOST" part here because some women are pretty direct & keep it to the point. But the majority just complicates things for themselves. For instance, when they say "leave me alone" they really mean "fight for me". When they say "I don't feel like it" what they actually mean is "convince me". When they say "good night" they mean, "start a new conversation".

Now for a woman who constantly does this, their brain tricks them into believing that men do the same. For example, if a guy says "I don't know where this is going" what he really means is "I actually have no fucking clue why we're together". And then he acts to compliment that statement he just made. He may ignore your calls, take days to reply or even ghost out on you. But what does the woman hear? "You need to convince me & change your behavior if we're gonna make this work". So thereafter she does all the compromises, the sacrifices, the waiting & tries & tries & tries hard enough & when she finally gets tired it goes "why couldn't he just tell me if he didn't like me?"

When a guy says "I don't really do relationships" what he actually means is "I really don't like commitments & sleeping with just one woman is never going to satisfy me". BUT, what does the woman hear? "Maybe you can be the one to change me". REALLY NOW?! So this guy who just said this to her is out there living his life, supporting his statement while she's at home trying to be loyal, learning all the housework, checking her phone every 2 minutes to see if she'd hear from him.

If he tells you "I'll talk to you later" he doesn't mean "text me every 5 mins to check up on me". He means "Leave me the fuck alone until I'm in the mood to talk". If he says he likes you, chances are he does. Atleast he likes you enough to sleep with you but what the woman hears is "He wants me to be his gf & I'm going to have his babies". This is where they screw things up in style. Hearing only what they want to hear.

Now among these pretty direct & straightforward men, you find the cowards who lack self-confidence to say it like it is. Sometimes all they want with you is a one night stand and they trick you into believing that you two might actually be heading somewhere. This might be the tricky part. BUT, it's actually not. WATCH THEIR ACTIONS!!

If a guy tells you, "I think you can be the one to change me" chances are, he's NEVER GOING TO CHANGE. You cannot change people & people just don't change. So watch what he does. His approach to persuade you. His interest in you. How well he pays attention to you. Now you won't know if he puts enough effort in you if you keep trying to reach out to him. Lay back & watch his next move when he doesn't hear from you for a while. Men like a challenge & they've been known to be the hunters. So if they want you, they will approach you.

If a guy says "lets hangout at 5 tomorrow" you shouldn't be the one reminding him at 3.30 that he has a date with you at 5. It's his job to let you know of the plan well in advance. If he reaches out to you at 4.45 & goes "what's up?" By all means, IGNORE! Cut him off before he creates further damage. Just because you like this guy, it doesn't mean you put your life on hold for him.

Sometimes we see the red flags & avoid it cus we just like them too much. Sometimes we just listen to the words & completely ignore their actions. But the truth is, it's never too hard to tell. If you can't identify them by their words, you can always do by their actions. Some men will act to justify their statements. Some will just tell you all the right kinds of things & act totally otherwise. But you can always tell what they're up to. YOU.JUST.NEED TO.PAY.ATTENTION.

So are men really as complicated?

Now there'll be some weird, bipolar characters who are hard to read. But as for the majority, you just need to watch what they do. Simple as that.

xx