It's ok to not feel ok

Find Comfort In The Chaos : what a great way to look at life.

Quite often than not, we feel like nothing seems right. We've hit rock bottom more times than we've been on mountain tops. We cry more than we laugh. We wonder more than we appreciate. We struggle more than we resolve. But worst of all, we forget who we are and that it's ok to feel all these things.

When nothing seems to be going right and it feels like the world is testing your will to live, we often question our being. Rather than dealing with one problem at a time we wonder why this is all happening at once. We tend to find salvation in the most toxic forms. We try to keep ourselves distracted, we try to find new addictions, we tend to get into the most unhealthy of relationships, etc.

What this is all doing is creating more damage to the original problem. What we need to remember is, no matter how good or bad of a person we are, somethings are inevitable. BUT the good news is, we're not a product of our circumstances, but rather our choices. At this very moment you might be feeling like your world is crumbling down. You might even feel helpless. Trust me when I say I know exactly what it feels like to watch your whole life blow up into pieces right in front of your eyes and just watch it all go up in flames because you can't really do anything about it. But what people don't quite seem to remember is that there is in fact something that can be done.

Whenever you feel like you're stuck in a rut and there is no escape, here are the things you need to remember.

IT'S OK TO NOT FEEL OK - ALL THE TIME

You're no god. there is no hard and fast rule that your life needs to be perfect all the time. If you feel like you're about to have a meltdown, then by all means have it. If you want to cry your lungs out, do just that. You don't need an immediate fix for your emotions. After all, the only way out is the way in. If you want to distance yourself from people do it. Your vulnerable emotions don't make you a lost cause. it just makes you beautifully human. But remember very well, It's NOT ok to not feel ok all the time. If you feel like you're constantly depressed and feeling off is a part of your lifestyle then that is something that definitely requires changing. 

When you feel like you're carrying the weight of the world on your shoulders, here are few things you can do to get the closure you need. Change the questions you ask and see how the answers change.

Instead of asking WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME, change it to WHAT IS THIS TRYING TO TEACH ME.

Instead of asking WHAT DID I DO TO DESERVE THIS, change it to WHAT CAN I DO TO CHANGE THIS.

Instead of asking HOW DID I GET HERE, change it to HOW CAN I GET OUT OF HERE.

Instead of asking HOW LONG AM I GOING TO GO THROUGH THIS, change it to WHAT DO I DO TODAY TO GET THROUGH THIS.

Very often, when you shift your questions, you'll discover that the problem has no more power than we give it. Most of the times, the results of our current circumstances are the consequences of our past choices. OR we have created an illusion of a problem that doesn't exist by dwelling in the past or worrying about the future. Be present in the moment and feel whatever you're feeling in this very moment. Whether it is happiness or sadness, embrace it with both arms and accept it, for it is what being present means. Then deal with it. Life can take a different direction if you're connected with yourself and you can acknowledge your thoughts, good or bad. And always, ALWAYS remember, you don't need to feel good all the time. What matters is how you find a ray of sunshine on your bad days. How you look for that silver lining in those dark clouds that shadow over you.